It has now been weeks since the final ball has dropped in our 2024 fall campaign and it’s been a challenge to button up the experiences in a neat little package. I’ve seen countless end of season posts from players and coaches. I feel a pressure to grab my favorite pics of the season and settle on a two sentence phrase that captures it all. Maybe even find a song that hits on the right level — One that reinforces my messaging. I could surely do all of that but for some reason things feel different this year, and if I’m being honest with myself, things have felt different the past few years.
Each season has a technical start and end. We show up on report day, experience so many amazing and challenging moments, and then the last point is played. We have an emotional moment in the locker room. We have exit meetings. Then we get excited about what’s next and immediately start to prepare for the following season. Winter and spring training events go on the calendar. Our schedule for next fall starts to take shape. The planning helps shift the focus to the future but I’m not sure it does much to help soften the emotional impact of the transition. It’s in these transitions that you feel hyper connected to what was and simultaneously, what can be. Staying in the here and now gets a little more challenging. There’s a change from an intense focus to a 10,000 foot view.
If emotional and psychological complexity were water, it feels like I’m drinking from fire hose, or maybe drowning. You pick your favorite analogy. Both seem to land with me but in different ways.
I just love being “in it” so much that the release of the daily pressure to prepare, the slightly diminished level of support we can provide to our players, and the change in routine and proximity with our staff is real challenge to process through. Then add in the whole senior thing — Ugh. We’ve thought about them each and everyday of our lives for 4+ years. They aren’t leaving this earth but it surely feels that way. Ironically, it’s a little like sending your actual kids off to college. First and foremost, you’re extremely proud of who they have become and how capable they are. You’re so excited for them and know they’ll do amazing things. You hope you’ve equipped them with some additional skills and tools that will serve them well. You can’t wait until you’ll get to catch up to learn about what the next chapter is like for them. But you’re also sad. You’ll miss having them around, because now they are family that you sincerely love and care for, and your relationship is transitioning to something new.
While all of that is being felt, there’s also a sincere sense of excitement and wonder about what is possible for the next phase of your relationships as well as the upcoming season. You’ll remind yourself that change is inevitable and that all the best things in your life have manifested on the other side of challenge and change.
As we shift gears to what’s ahead, we look at every little area that we can evolve in and we immediately start dedicating energy to being our best for those around us so that the collective group can start to create the vision for what’s possible, build the road map, and then start on the journey. Where will the challenges and/or sources of growth originate from? How much can our relationships grow and evolve with newcomers, returners, and staff? Goosebumps.
This whole transition thing isn’t just about volleyball seasons. It’s the new year that is upon us. It’s the status of relationships. It’s the changing health of your loved ones. Whether it’s about a season, a calendar year, or our lives, it’s all finite. If it’s all temporary, then the key is presence. Perhaps I’ve wrongfully been trying to put my myriad of emotions in neat little boxes so that I could either mourn the end of something or be excited about the future. Maybe it’s just messy. Maybe messy is better.
I’m coming to terms with the idea that maybe there’s a huge amount of magic in the transitions. Maybe there’s no putting things in neat boxes. I want to live a full life that includes the richness of the entire emotional scale. I surely feel that now, and I wouldn’t want to change a thing. Here’s to what was, what can be, and being right here.
Happy New Year!
